The ADA Is A Pathetic Joke, But Not All Of Its Members Are Shit

The ADA is the American Dietetic Association. Perhaps you don't give a crap. Would you care more if I told you that in 2012 they changed their name to the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics? Why would they dare to do such a thing? In the press release they said that they really, really care about nutrition and they train nutritionists so, you know, nutrition should be in their name and shit. Plus, what the fuck is a dietetic?

No cheese = sad :(
Because they care so much about nutrition (you can tell because it's in their name) it make sense that they would create an official program called Kids Eat Right. This is especially valuable because childrens aren't technically human, so they shouldn't eat human food except sometimes. Parents tend to be confused about this, frequently mistaken their childrens for humans, and accidentally serving them human food.


Thank fucking God that the AoNaD can put their credibility behind healthy childrens food by putting an official logo on food appropriate for childrens. So, based on childrens not being able to eat human food, parents being fucking stupid, and AoNaD being a corrupt piece of shit organization, earlier this month Kraft singles started sporting the Kids Eat Right logo.

I can has cheeze?
To recap, in 2003 the FDA officially said that Kraft singles and Velveeta were not technically cheese and that they could no longer legally call them cheese.

Now, on the face of it you might think to yourself, "What the fuck are those mother fuckers doing? How much were they paid to say that "not-legally-cheese" was a health food for kids? It's not even fucking food if by "food" you mean "food!" I can't trust anyone!" And that would be a reasonable conclusion to jump to.

But not every member of AoNaD is a pathetic disgrace. Just some of them.

Just eat the cheese!
On March 16, a number of AoNaD members (nutritionists) started a petition on change.org to get the money sucking assholes to take the Kids Eat Right endorsement away from "not-legally-cheese." As of this writing 11,000+ AoNaD members have signed. Which means that there are fewer than 12,000 out of 75,000 AoNaD nutritionists who give a fuck or know how to use a computer.

So, the Academy of Nutrition and Diatetics has proven itself to be untrustworthy. The Kids Eat Right logo is for sale. A small band of rebels is crying in the wilderness. If only childrens could eat human food...